Beware of Love Bombing, Expressions full of love but in fact only pretend

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Beware of Love Bombing, Expressions full of love but in fact only pretend
Beware of Love Bombing, Expressions full of love but in fact only pretend

Romance in the form of attention or gifts at the beginning of a date does feel sweet. However, be aware of the love bombing that may be present in your relationship. Love bombing is usually characterized by manipulative behavior by a partner, after you have received loving treatment

When you're in love, it's normal for your partner to pamper you with attention, sweet gifts, and romantic gestures. You too may be carried away, and give a higher trust and endless love for your partner.

Beware of Love Bombing, Expressions full of love but in fact only pretend - Alodokter

But sometimes, everything that is given with love is just a manipulative tactic. You will be made to fall deeply in love, until he can control your life. This behavior is popularly known as love bombing.

There are several reasons why someone does love bombing, one of which is narcissistic personality disorder. This personality disorder is characterized by a desire to manipulate someone, by giving them compliments and attention to make them look like the perfect match.

People with narcissistic personalities are very good at showing that they deserve to be admired and recognized. The worst part is, the words of love that are expressed solely to get what they want, such as money, sex, compliments, and attention.

So, the more you are lulled by their seduction, the smoother their motives will be.

Signs of Love Bombing to Watch Out for

At first it was hard to tell the difference between true love or love bombing. However, there are some recognizable signs to prevent a love bomber from taking control of your life, including:

1. One-way communication

If your partner talks more about themselves and ignores your wants or needs, this could be a sign of love bombing. This one-way communication is not only unhe althy, it creates an opening for them to control anything about you.

2. Too many gifts

Although it's fun when you get gifts from loved ones, you need to be suspicious when the gifts given are too many and seem excessive. Love bombers also usually don't want to listen to your rejection of the gifts they give.

This is a manipulative tactic used by perpetrators to make you feel indebted to them. When you feel indebted, usually someone will more easily grant the wishes of others.

However, not everyone who likes to give gifts is a love bomber. It could be because he knows that your love language is receiving gifts, so he likes to give gifts to you. So, create good communication with your partner so that there are no misunderstandings, OK.

3. Always saying compliments

Compliments that are constantly thrown by your partner at the beginning of a date can be signs of love bombing. Some sentences that are generally used by love bombing actors include:

  • “I want to live with you forever”
  • “You make me comfortable”
  • “You are so perfect to complete my life”
  • “Only with you I can fall in love like this”

If this sentence is said after a long romantic relationship, of course it will make your heart flutter. But if it comes out at the beginning of a date and in a very short time, this is worth cheating because it seems insincere.

4. Wants your full attention

Love bombers will always want your undivided attention, no matter if you are busy or need some me time. These signs usually appear after they overwhelm you with sweet treats, behavior, and words at the start of a date.

They might get angry when you hangout with friends, and even limit your socializing. In fact, true love should not be restrained. A good partner will always respect your privacy and the time you have, and give you the freedom to do whatever is good for you.

5. Want commitment in a short time

Just met but already making big plans like wedding? It could be a sign of love bombing. Real relationships take time to develop, which includes getting to know your partner's character and considering the possibility of taking it to a more serious level.

Hasty planning for the future will only create high expectations, and risk causing deep disappointment. This behavior can also make you overly trusting, making it easy for the perpetrator to control everything, including blackmail and sexual harassment.

6. Very sensitive to criticism

As previously explained, perpetrators of love bombing have a tendency to suffer from narcissistic personality disorder. Well, one of the signs of this personality disorder is that it is very sensitive if it is given criticism or input.

They will feel insulted when you criticize, and end up in denial.

What to Do When Stuck in Love Bombing ?

When in love, many people don't realize what they have done for their partner. This often makes a person trapped in a toxic relationship, because he is unable to control the love that is so passionate and fulfills whatever decisions his partner makes.

A he althy relationship will give each other the freedom to express their feelings or do things they like. Of course there is nothing wrong with giving attention and love. But it should be realized, too much attention can make a person feel constrained.

If you feel that way, invite your partner to communicate. Say everything that is stuck in your heart, whether it's an expression of love that feels suspicious or limits in socializing that make you feel constrained.

You can see how the character of a real partner is, from the way he reacts to the things you say. If he opens up and explains why he behaves the way he does, maybe you and your partner can work together to find a solution.

But if he responds with anger or is trying to control your life more and more, it may be time to end the relationship. If it continues, it is not impossible that love bombing will end up being violence and harassment, both physically and emotionally.

Also, try to stay logical if you receive an expression of love when you first meet. Don't drown in sweet words from someone you just met, because a real relationship takes time to develop.

No need to rush when falling in love. Everything will come with the right people and at the right time. Don't expect that falling in love will make you happy. Happy yourself before falling in love is the best thing to avoid the trap of love bombing perpetrators.

However, if you or someone close to you has a tendency to do love bombing, don't hesitate to consult a psychologist or psychiatrist to get the right treatment.

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