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Some things in life need to be managed. However, if you feel like controlling a lot of things and start to get restless if things around you and even other people don't go your way, then be careful, you might be a control freak
Control freak is a term to describe someone who always wants to control many things around him to suit his will. They can also manage all the little things that are not even their responsibility and can feel restless to the point of getting angry if things don't go their way.
People who are control freaks are usually not aware of their controlling behavior. Because, this is a way to vent his anxiety. This attitude is also associated with psychological problems that make sufferers unable to control themselves, such as OCD, anxiety disorders, and personality disorders.
Control Freak Characteristics
We can meet a control freak wherever we are, be it at work, family, friends, even family. The victims are sometimes not aware of this treatment, because the perpetrator does it implicitly and subtly. In relationships, a control freak also often ends up in love bombing behavior.
To find out whether you or the people around you have control freak behavior or not, identify the following characteristics:
1. Unreasonable demands
People who are control freaks will try to manage a lot of things. Not only for their own sake, they also like to regulate the lives of others who have nothing to do with themselves. The rules that are made are also sometimes unreasonable and make the victim overwhelmed.
2. Always thinks he's right
The individual control freak thinks he's in the right. Instead of acknowledging the strengths of others, they exaggerate the shortcomings of others so that they are seen as great. They don't hesitate to criticize or correct others with irrational arguments.
Besides, they also feel they know best what is best for everyone. So, personal control freaks will influence their victims to change according to their wishes under the pretext of bringing change for the better.
3. Doing gaslighting
People who like to control are synonymous with playing victims. If something goes wrong, instead of correcting themselves, they are busy blaming others and looking for justification. They also do not hesitate to intimidate and do gaslighting so that the victim feels guilty.
4. Behaving rudely
Not only controlling here and there, personal control freaks can also behave violently towards their victims. They generally speak in a high-pitched, yelling, and angry tone. People who are control freaks can also feel jealous and irritated when their victims ignore them.
How to Deal with Control Freaks
Control freak includes a toxic attitude as well as a form of manipulative treatment and bullying. This attitude can make the victim not have the freedom to express themselves, feel inferior, anxious, blame themselves, and are at risk of causing mental disorders, such as depression.
If you find that people around you are doing control freaks and have harmed you, don't be silent, okay? Come on, deal with it in the following way:
- Set boundaries and stay out of friendship with him as much as possible. So, if he is your co-worker, your business with him is only work.
- Speak politely but firmly if the controlling behavior has exceeded the limit.
- No need to try to change the control freak.
- Focus on yourself and don't worry about his attitude. Do well what is your responsibility.
Besides, you also need to self-evaluate, huh. If you have control freak traits in you, try to start managing your emotions better. Learn to respect others because he althy relationships are created when each party can respect each other.
If you still have questions about a control freak or are having trouble getting out of a toxic relationship, you can consult a psychologist to get the best solution.