The Reasons Behind Often Blaming Yourself and How To Overcome It

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The Reasons Behind Often Blaming Yourself and How To Overcome It
The Reasons Behind Often Blaming Yourself and How To Overcome It

When neglecting to do something or failing to achieve a goal, many people immediately blame themselves. Instead of solving problems, this habit can actually have a bad impact, you know. Come on, identify what are the reasons behind often blaming yourself and how to overcome it

Self-blame behavior or self-blame is an emotional torture that someone does to himself. If not addressed immediately, this behavior can become a reflex thing to do on various occasions, even when the person is not fully involved in the problem at hand.

The Reasons Behind Often Blaming Yourself and How To Overcome It - Alodokter

In addition, constantly blaming yourself can lead to a sense of insecurity that can hinder the development of your potential. In more severe cases, this habit can also lead to mental he alth problems.

Reasons Why Often Blame Yourself

There are several reasons why people often blame themselves, including:

1. Has an obsessive personality

People with obsessive personalities set the standards too high and try to do everything perfectly and in order. They cannot tolerate a mistake, even a small one. People with this personality tend to blame themselves if something goes wrong.

2. Habit of self-criticism

Self-criticism is actually okay. This is precisely important for introspection and self-development. However, over-criticizing yourself can lead to badmouthing, blaming, or exaggerating your own faults.

3. Past trauma

Self-blame is prone to occur in people who have experienced trauma in childhood, for example due to sexual harassment.

Children don't understand the motives of other people's treatment of them, so they can feel that the traumatic event was caused by their fault. Well, this mindset can continue into adulthood, and develop into a habit of blaming yourself every time there is a problem.

In addition, victims of physical or verbal bullying by their parents or friends can also grow up to be people who often blame themselves every time they are faced with a problem.

4. Depression

Another reason why people often blame themselves is because they are depressed. This condition will make the sufferer feel insecure and feel that all the problems that occur are caused by him.

In addition to some of the reasons above, sometimes self-blame may also occur more often in people who are too good with others.

How to Overcome Self-blame

If you often blame yourself, try changing the habit of torturing yourself like this. Come on, apply the following ways to overcome the habit of blaming yourself:

1. Admit mistakes, don't blame yourself

Admitting mistakes and blaming yourself are not the same thing, you know. When you admit your mistakes, you will find what things you need to fix and focus on fixing them, not lamenting about them.With this attitude, you will become a responsible person.

If you're still thinking, "I always make mistakes and can't do anything well," turn those thoughts into positive thoughts, such as, "Today I made a mistake, but I will learn not to repeat it again.”

2. Motivate yourself with positive thinking

Make a list of what strengths you have. If you have difficulty, ask your friends to mention what your strengths are. Well, when you are in trouble and blame yourself for the problem, you can encourage yourself by reading this note.

3. Pour out your feelings in a diary

Even though it seems old-fashioned, writing down an event and feeling in a diary can make you realize that you weren't wrong. If it turns out that you are wrong, writing it down can make you realize that your mistake wasn't really that big.

Take time for a few minutes before going to bed to write down the things that you feel are stuck in your heart in a diary. That way, you can feel calmer and sleep better.

4. Realize that your own feelings must also be taken care of

Take care of other people's feelings is a good thing to do. Likewise with taking care of yourself. Remember, your feelings can't be hurt either. By instilling this in your heart, the habit of self-blame can gradually disappear.

The important thing you also need to do is respect and love yourself. Looking down on and not respecting yourself can make you blame yourself every time something goes wrong. Eventually, you will hate yourself even more.

If you are used to blaming yourself, identify the reason behind it and do the ways above to overcome it. If you're still blaming yourself, let alone to the point of wanting to hurt yourself, don't hesitate to consult a psychologist.

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