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It's been a while since you realized that your little one prefers to play alone. At school, his teacher also said that he had almost no close friends. Is it normal for children to like to be alone and how to deal with it?
Actually, it's okay if your child prefers to be alone. Only having 1 or 2 friends also does not mean the child has problems socializing. However, if your little one has absolutely no friends, you may need to find out why and pay special attention to them.
Various Reasons Children Like To Be Alone
One of the reasons children prefer to be alone is because they feel they don't know how to start playing with other people who are not familiar with them. Children whose nature is shy and introverted or ambivert will also need time to be alone.
In addition, other factors, such as lack of sleep, can make children become more irritable and lack energy to socialize. Children can also prefer to play alone because they feel that their parents don't like some of their friends.
The thing you need to be aware of is if your little one withdraws from society because of a personality disorder, anxiety disorder, depression, or trauma due to sexual harassment or other forms of violence, such as bullying by friends. In certain cases, the child may also be alone more often if he suffers from certain conditions, such as autism.
How to Help Lonely Children
Mothers can start paying attention to your little one's friendship patterns from the age of 3-4 years or school age. If you see your little one being alone more often, you should immediately talk to him to find out why. Try to understand and invite him to discuss without forcing Mother's will.
Besides that, Mother can also help her by doing several things, such as:
1. Meet a matched friend
If your little one looks good with one or more friends, you can schedule a play event with these friends. If your little one can play intimately with friends who feel comfortable with him, it is hoped that he will be able to adapt more easily to his other friends.
2. Observing all daily activities
Did your little one finish his food? Is he getting enough sleep? Are his assignments at school finished? Does he interact with his friends? The answers to these questions can help you to see the character of your child's personality or the cause of his aloof nature.
3. Help to calm down
Some children do have a higher level of anxiety than their other friends, so they tend to be afraid to make friends and prefer to be alone.
The solution is that you can help your little one deal with this, for example by accompanying him when he has to meet a lot of new people.
4. Giving support
Giving support is different from pushing a child, yes, Bun. Your little one may pull away if you push him away with words like, “Why don't you find a friend?”.
Instead, give him support by listening to his complaints and encouraging him to dare to tell Mother. This will also help him to be more open and familiar with the people around him.
5. Providing the right environment
If your child chooses to play alone because your friends don't like you, you can start a dialogue with your child, for example by talking about the bad effects that might arise if your child follows the bad habits of their friends.
However, parents shouldn't be too pushy or authoritarian towards their child's circle of friends. It's good if you listen to your little one's point of view first, then give him good understanding and direction.
If your little one wants, you can provide the right environment and you believe it is good for him, for example by registering him to join a sports club or art activity he likes.
6. Set a good example
Don't forget to evaluate yourself, Bun. Do you socialize with friends and neighbors? It's not impossible, you know, children like to be alone because they imitate their parents who rarely socialize. On the other hand, seeing Mom happy with her friends will motivate her to make more friends.
Well, those are some things you can do if your child likes to be alone. However, you need to know that there is a positive side to children who like to play alone.
This means that he feels enough with himself, and this can also be a sign that your little one has high intelligence and creativity, you know, Bun.
A child who has many friends sometimes needs time to play alone, just like an adult who needs time to be alone from time to time.
So, it's okay if your little one looks happy and enjoys playing alone more. Always support him to develop his creativity and imagination. Most importantly, children can still socialize and are not closed at all with other people.
If your child is really introverted and always aloof, and you find it difficult to help him, you can consult a psychologist to get the best advice and solutions.