Why Children Lie and How to Deal with It

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Why Children Lie and How to Deal with It
Why Children Lie and How to Deal with It

As a parent, you may feel disappointed or even angry when you find out that your child is lying. However, it is important for parents to find out the reason why their children lie so they can react wisely

When you find out your child is lying, there's no need to rush to consider yourself a failure as a parent. The reason is, lying is one of the things that children often learn as they grow.

Causes of Children Lying and How to Deal with It - Alodokter

Children will usually start to know about lying at the age of 3 years. At this age, children begin to realize that their parents are not necessarily able to guess everything they are thinking, so they think there are things that can be done without their parents knowing.

Entering the age of 4-6 years, children may be more adept at lying. They can already show a certain facial expression and tone of voice to tell a lie.

As they get older, children may be able to lie when asked about various things, ranging from things related to lessons or activities at school, homework, teachers, to friends.

Reasons That Make Children Lie

Not everything that makes a child lie is a bad thing. Sometimes, children can lie because they can't tell what's true and what's not.

In addition, children may also lie for the following reasons:

1. Having too much imagination

Little children tend to have high imaginations. Sometimes, this can make it difficult for children to distinguish between what is reality and what is just a fantasy.

Children can even say things that are actually only their imaginations. For example, your little one says that a monster has ruffled his room.

2. Feeling afraid of being punished

Sometimes, children will choose to lie for fear of making their parents angry or emotional. This is done as an effort so that children do not get punished for their mistakes.

3. Avoiding a job or obligation

Children may lie by pretending to be sick or sleepy when they are lazy to do something like schoolwork or cleaning their room.

4. Attention seeking

Everyone is certainly happy when praised or noticed, including children. This can lead your child to look for any way to get other people to compliment or pay attention, including lying.

For example, a child makes up a story by telling his friends that he has got a new expensive toy because he often helps his parents. This he did to look cool in the eyes of his friends.

5. Trying to get something they want

Children often lie to get something they want. For example, when children want to rush to play, they may lie by saying they have finished their homework.

6. Fear of disappointing parents

When a child is not able to meet the demands of parents who are too high, he may lie to make his parents happy.

For example, when children get bad grades in school, they will lie to their parents by saying their grades are okay. They may do this because they are afraid that their parents will be disappointed or angry.

7. Having emotional problems

Children occasionally lie is a natural thing, as long as it does not cause a harmful impact on themselves or others. However, in certain cases, children may often lie because they are experiencing emotional problems, such as bullying or depression.

This can be seen from his changed behavior and it looks as if he is hiding his feelings or problems he is facing.

Whatever the reason, lying is a bad behavior that should be avoided by children from an early age. Every parent or child caretaker needs to educate children well so that he does not often do these bad habits.

Tips to Stop Children's Habits of Lying

Age of 5–10 years is a good time for parents to explain to their children the difference between lies and honesty and the pros and cons. Parents should make their children realize that lying is a bad habit and that it will get them into trouble later.

As a parent, of course you are worried and don't want your little one to keep lying. Therefore, there are several ways that can be done to stop a child's habit of lying, namely:

Respond in a different way

If your child is talking about something that hasn't really happened, parents can respond with a non-judgmental question. This can encourage children to admit what they really feel or experience.

However, if your child is lying to cover up his mistake, encourage him to admit his mistake and give praise when he is telling the truth. However, parents should not immediately scold their children when they make a mistake, for example when spilling a drink on the floor.

If a child lies because he wants to be considered good or to get praise, parents can direct the child to speak according to the actual situation. Explain that he doesn't need to be the best to get compliments and just enough to be himself.

Being a good example for children

The thing that is no less important is to emphasize the value of honesty in the family. Parents can set an example of honest behavior and don't be shy about admitting mistakes and apologizing with clear reasons when they make mistakes.

Gives a child a warning if he lies

Parents can also provide rules and boundaries regarding what behavior is acceptable and what is not. When a child lies, explain what the consequences are, so that the child does not repeat it. However, avoid corporal punishment, ok!

Avoid being called a 'liar'

Also, avoid labeling your child a 'liar' or 'liar'. This will only make him lie more or just traumatize him. Instead, give praise or sweet words for him when the child says the honest thing. This can motivate him to continue to behave honestly.

Parents need to first determine what causes children to lie so they can react wisely and solve the problem. That way, the child can more easily stop the habit of lying.

If the parents have tried various ways but the child still often lies, try to consult a psychologist. In some cases, children may often lie because they have certain psychological disorders.

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